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This is difficult for me to write and maybe for you to read. The next worst will be the day we bury you from AIDS." Much has changed since then.
My mother said, softly, "This is the worst day of our lives.
Some leave the question of status blank or even list their status as negative.
Others may list their status upfront but refrain from showing their faces.
After all, we don't tolerate racist profiles or verbal harassment.
And for many people, like my parents, a fear of gay people and HIV has been replaced with love and acceptance.
But as gay men, we're still ashamed of HIV, whether we're positive or negative.
We need to inform ourselves about the risks of HIV in 2012 and understand what it means to have the infection today.
And we need to understand, and incorporate into our sex lives, the fact that a risk of transmission is higher with someone who doesn't know his status and/or is not on medication than with someone who is being treated.
I've always known you can't get HIV through kissing (it's a simple, safe activity), but the irrational mind is powerful.