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Just don’t overdo it, and remember that humor and tone don’t always come through in a text.“[Texting] is a great way to flirt, maybe give them a taste of who you are,” says dating coach Chrisler.“If there’s not an immediate spark, you’re wasting both of your time,” says Manley.The advice used to be to avoid talk of politics and former relationships on early dates, but now many favor putting it all out there from the beginning.“A week later, maybe you’d be like, ‘I should reach out.’” Gone are the days when dates had to be an elaborate night out at a buzzy restaurant or club.Now, watching a few episodes of “Westworld” is considered a hot date. “Even if you don’t have sex while you watch, you can finish a show and have something to talk about.” A survey found that millennials are 270 percent more likely than other generations to be turned on if their match watches the same TV show.Manley agrees, noting that in current times, “Someone you met on a dating app might have gone on three more dates by the time you get back to them three days later.” Forget keeping things chaste until you’re several dates in.
The 1996 comedy “Swingers” popularized the idea that cool kids must wait three days to call a date after an encounter.Manley is on the same page, but his reasoning is more economical: “Guys still [usually] make more money than women, so they should offer to pay, regardless of whoever asked out whom,” he says.“There’s a sort of New Age chivalry about that.” Unfortunately, the rule seems even less clear for those in the LGBT community, says Morningside Heights resident and comedian Stephanie Foltz, who is bisexual."It depends on how rapidly or slowly things progress." Joan Allen, a relationship expert, finds that baby boomers are far more likely to wait to have sex than younger daters."Especially among older people who went through the sexual revolution, with maturity they realize there are emotional consequences for getting involved in a sexual relationship," says Allen, author of Celebrating Single and Getting Love Right: From Stalemate to Soulmate.
Whether you're new to the dating scene, a regular player, or jumping back into the game after a long hiatus, the same questions about dating rules apply: How soon do you lean over for that first kiss? And last -- but by no means least -- how do you know when the time is right for sex?